So you’ve decided to explore the world of strap-on dildos? Congratulations! You’ve come to the right place.
My boyfriend and I have been using strap-ons for over 5 years now and have learned some valuable lessons that I’ll be more than happy to share with you.
First of all, let’s make a toast to discovering sexual pleasures you never knew existed. What I’m about to share with you could potentially change your sex life – forever!
Without further ado, here’s the only strap-on dildo guide you’ll ever need. So sit back, get your straps on and enjoy the ride!
Practice Makes Perfect
You won’t get everything right the first time unless you’re an experienced pornstar. Granted, you’ll probably put on the straps wrongly or even feel a little bit weird when the artificial dick hangs from your waistline the first time. And that’s perfectly fine.
They say practice makes perfect, and that’s what you need to do with the strap-on dong. For best results, practice wearing it and ensure it feels comfortable. Remember, comfort is critical — you won’t give your partner a great session if you’re uncomfortable.
Communication Is Key
Next, start slowly with the toy as you learn how to penetrate your partner with it. For best results, keep communicating with your partner about how the toy feels, including their favorite position, thrusting tempo, amount of lube needed, or anything else they desire to create unforgettable memories and inexplicable pleasure.
Use a Condom
Using a condom is especially important if you don’t know your partner’s health status. The same applies if you’re planning on using the strap-on on multiple partners (think of a threesome as an example).
Lube, Lube, and More Lube
Remember to use enough lube to make penetration easier and less painful. But keep in mind that not every type of lube you come across is safe. Here are some quick things you need to know about picking the best lube for sex toys:
- Water-based lube is the safest.
- Avoid lube that contains any of the following ingredients: Nonoxynol-9, glycerine, propylene glycol, and petroleum products.
- If the lube is oil-based, don’t use it with a latex condom – the condom will break and put you at risk of infection.
Keep the Dildo Clean Before, During, and After Use
Dildos can give you powerful orgasms just as long as you take good care of them by keeping them clean before, during, and even after use. The good thing is that strap-on dildos are not that difficult to clean.
However, because these toys have different designs and features, there’s no one-fits-all way of cleaning them. Our sexologist Robert Thomas has covered different ways to clean sex toys and protect yourself from infections in this article.
Best Sex Positions To Try With Strap-On Dildo
Now that you know how to use a strap-on dildo, it’s time to take the adventure a notch higher. The truth is that not every sex position works with this toy; some feel better than others. I’ll discuss some of the most popular positions and what they are best for, beginning with my personal favorite.
Pegger’s Delight
This is by far the most popular position – and my favorite – to use with a strap-on phallus. The best thing about it is that it works for both anal and vaginal penetration. And when done right, it hits all the right spots. Here’s all you need to do:
- Have your partner get on all fours (doggy style)
- Apply lube to their anus or vagina
- Slowly penetrate and begin to thrust
Spooning
Spooning allows you to penetrate your partner effortlessly while lying on your side. Although not my all-time favorite strap-on dildo position, I love how good spooning feels, especially for anal penetration. Here’s how it works:
- Lay on your side facing our partner’s back
- Apply some lube to their glory hole
- Slightly lift their leg (or place a pillow between their legs to keep one leg raised)
- Slowly penetrate your partner and begin thrusting
- Start slow and increase the tempo per their directions
Missionary
You can never go wrong with the good old missionary style. One thing I love about this position is that it allows for intense penetration. All you need to do is put on the strap-on phallus, apply some lube, have your partner lay on their back facing up, spread their legs, and gently penetrate.
Another thing I love about this position is that you can add other toys to the party for that extra pleasure. For example, my boyfriend keeps his fleshlight overflowing with cum when I penetrate his ass in this position.
More Ways to Use a Strap-On Dildo
Strap-ons are great for penetrative sex, but that’s not the only way to use them. You can get a little bit more creative by creating unforgettable memories with this toy. Here are some additional ways to use a strap-on.
Oral Sex
Let’s face it – we all love some good oral sex. If you love sucking dick, but your sexual partner is female, a strap-on dildo allows you to keep your throat game alive even without an actual dick.
Boob Sex
If you’re in a lesbian relationship, you can spice up your sex life by giving your partner some nice boob sex. But how do you do that if you don’t have a penis? That’s where a strap-on dildo comes in. The same applies if you’re in a heterosexual relationship but your man isn’t so well-endowed to slide his tools in between your boobs.
A hollow strap-on dildo might be all he needs to add extra inches and enjoy great boob sex with you.
Things You Shouldn’t Be Worried About When Choosing a Strap-On Dildo
It is normal to overthink when choosing a strap-on dildo, but you shouldn’t. First, of course, you want to ensure that the dildo you choose is the right fit for you and your partner. That said, you shouldn’t think too much.
The answer to the question of whether or not you or your partner will enjoy this toy will depend on how you use it and not how it looks. Just as long as it looks like a penis, that’s good enough. To put things into perspective, factors such as color won’t significantly impact how the toy feels unless you have a color fetish.
How To Pick a Strap-On Dildo Harness?
Picking the right strap-on dildo is important but having the right harness for the dildo is even more critical. The harness is what holds the dildo in position. This part will decide whether you’ll have a steamy session with your partner or one to forget.
That said, when shopping for a dildo harness, it’s important to understand what it entails. Here are some popular characteristics and features you’ll find in some strap-on harnesses.
Underwear Style
As the name suggests, an underwear-style harness is usually shaped like underwear. This was actually my first strap-on harness, and I loved it because it was beginner friendly and offered more support than most traditional harnesses. So if you’re just a beginner looking to explore the world of strap-ons, the underwear style is a great place to start.
Thong Harness
A thong harness is great for advanced users. It offers less support than the underwear version but looks sexier.
Three-Strap or Jock Harness
If you’re looking for the ideal harness for your man, the three-strap or jock option is a great pick. This harness is designed to grip a man’s butt and provide minimalist comfort simultaneously.
Corset Harness
A corset harness is what you need to take your sexiness to a whole new level. It combines fashion with function to give you and your partner memorable memories in the bedroom. For example, some corsets are designed to be worn with or without a dildo.
Rope Harness
I’m not really a big fan of a rope dildo harness, but they do exist. I find them a little bit unsteady and uncomfortable. The last time I tried one, I had pressure marks all over my body, and that’s the last thing you want to wake up to the morning after.
Vac-U-Lock Harness
Developed by Doc Johnson, one of the most famous sex toy brands in the market today, a Van-U-Lock harness features a special adapter and plug system attached to a unisex and adjustable strap-on harness. The best thing about this harness is that it works great for all users, whether you are a beginner, an intermediary, or an expert.
How To Pick a Strap on Dildo?
Strap-on dildos come in different shapes, styles, and sizes. Ultimately, the best strap-on dildo for you and your partner will depend on your preferences. That said, here are some key factors to consider when picking the right one for you and your beloved.
Don’t Compromise Safety
Safety comes first when choosing any sex toy, not just a strap-on dildo. To put things into perspective, Sextopedia conducted the biggest dildo survey involving over 2468 participants between October 2021 and July 2022. The study revealed that 11% of the participants considered ‘Body-safe’ as one of the key characteristics of a good dildo.
Additionally, 43% of the participants choose silicone as the safest dildo material. Here’s an article I recently wrote about safe and unsafe dildo materials worth checking out.
Consider the Receiver’s Preferences
The receiver should have more control over the dildo selection process. This is because they’re actually receiving every thrust you send their way. Talk to your partner about their preferred dildo in terms of style, design, size, shape, and anything else that defines the perfect dildo for them.
Let’s take a quick look at the different types of strap-on dildos available in some of the best online sex toy stores.
Curved Strap-On Dildos
Curved dildos are among my favorites because they have a unique way of navigating the honeypot and finally locating the G-spot. Who doesn’t like that?
And I know I’m not the only one obsessed with curved dildos; the Sextopedia dildo survey found that at least 11% of the 2468 participants owned curved dildos!
Double Ended Strap-On Dildos
Double-ended dildos are also great if you wish to experience double pleasure. This type of dildo penetrates the anus and vagina at the same time, giving powerful orgasms. Our sexologist Robert Thomas recently covered the top 7 double-ended dildos for elevated pleasure on both ends. You may want to check that out for some great recommendations.
Hollow DIldos
If your partner struggles with erectile dysfunction or isn’t just as blessed down there with the right tools of the trade, a hollow dildo is a relationship saver. And if you’re unsure where to start, here are some great options to choose from.
Strapless Strap Dildo
Then here comes another bad boy: the strapless strap dildo. As the name suggests, this dildo doesn’t need a harness. Rather, the ‘L-shaped’ dildo penetrates the vagina on one end, usually the shorter end, and then the longer end penetrates the receiver’s vagina or anus.
The best thing about this toy is that it guarantees double pleasure – I’ve actually used it with my boyfriend to stimulate his prostate while massaging my G-spot, resulting in a win-win situation and a happy ending.
Vibrating Strap-On Dildo
For a more explosive session, consider adding a vibrating strap-on dildo to the equation. Again, there are many different options to choose from; you can either choose one that massages your partner’s clitoris and penetrates their vagina simultaneously or one that vibrates inside your vagina on one end and penetrates your partner on the other end. Whichever option you choose, it’ll be worth every second.
Choose Dildos That Actually Work
Not every dildo you come across will work with a strap-on. For this reason, it’s important that you know exactly what to settle for.
Suction cup dildos and flat base dildos are among the best dildos to use with a strap-on. The good thing about suction cup dildos is that, other than using a strap-on, there are many other ways of using this dildo, even without your partner. I’ve discussed some great sex positions to try with a suction cup dildo in this article.
How To Attach a Strap on Dildo To Harness
Putting on a strap-on dildo to harness shouldn’t be that difficult, although you may struggle with the first few attempts. That’s totally fine. Keep in mind that practice makes perfect.
Assuming that you have a standard harness with an O-ring, metal snaps, and a compatible dildo, here’s all you need to do.
- Remove the O-ring from the harness
- Insert the dildo through the O-ring
- Reattach the O-ring using the metal snaps and ensure the dildo is firmly held
- Wear the harness as you would your pants
- Adjust the harness to secure it firmly but not tightly around your hip bones
- Adjust the thigh strap if available
- Apply lube before penetrating your partner
- Hold the dildo and gently penetrate your partner
- Start slow and then pick up the tempo per your partner’s preferences
- Ensure you keep your partner in constant communication (dirty talk is key)
- Enjoy the ride
What if My Dildo Doesn’t Fit in Strap-On Harness?
The party won’t stop just because your dildo doesn’t fit in your strap-on harness. You can always find a way around it.
The first option is to get a new O-ring. If you know the exact size that fits your harness, consider getting a metal ring.
On the other hand, a rubber O-ring is usually more compatible with most strap-on harnesses.
Here’s a pro tip: you can also use a rubber O-ring as a cock ring!
Yes, you read that here first.
What Else Can You Attach to a Strap on Harness?
A strap-on dildo isn’t the only thing you can attach to a strap-on harness. Consider introducing other toys to your steamy sessions. Examples include putt plugs and prostate massagers.
How To Make a Homemade DIY Strapon Harness
The exact steps will depend on what type of strap-on harness you want to make. There are two common DIY strap-on harnesses: the rope-based and the underwear-based. Here’s a detailed guide on creating a DIY strap-on harness.
FAQs
What Is a Strap-On Dildo?
A strap-on dildo is a type of dildo designed to be worn with a harness during sex. These dildos come in different styles, designs, sizes, and functionalities. Here are the top 6 best strap-ons worth checking out.
How Much Do Strap-On Dildos Cost?
High-quality strapon-dildos usually cost anywhere between $30 to $100. The exact price will depend on the design, size, functionality, and style. To find a great and safe strap-on dildo, ensure you shop from the best online sex toy stores.
What’s the Best Strap-On Dildo?
Everyone has their own unique preferences and experiences when it comes to sex toys, not just strap-on dildos. For example, my favorite strap-on dildo is the Lovehoney Advanced Unisex Strapon. I particularly love that it is unisex, meaning I can use it with my boyfriend without needing a replacement. The size (7 inches) and the curve also make it the perfect dildo for G-spot stimulation.
Can I Use Cyberskin Dildos As Strap on Dildos?
Cyberskin dildos might not be unsafe, but they aren’t so great. The biggest concern with these dildos is that they are porous, which puts them at a higher risk of transmitting infections.
Can I Use Glass Dildos as a Strap on Dildos?
Absolutely. Glass is actually one of the safest dildo materials out there. So, go ahead and have some fun!
Can I Use Strap-On Vibrators?
Yes, you can. In fact, some vibrators are designed to vibrate on both ends, guaranteeing double-ended pleasure for you and your partner and a happy ending.
Do Lesbians Use Strap-On Dildos?
Yes, they do. Strap-ons allow lesbians to experience pleasurable penetration without needing an actual penis.
Can Men With ED Use Strap-On Hollow Dildos?
Yes, they can. Other than increasing penile length, strap-ons can also be used to manage erectile dysfunction. This is because the dildo stays erect throughout the session and even after.
Is Strap-On Dildo Good for Pegging?
Yes, it’s one of the best dildos for pegging. Here’s how to master the art of pegging and keep your partner begging for more.
What Is “Packing”?
Packing, in the sexual context, refers to wearing padding or a penis-shaped object in front of the underwear or pants to simulate a penis or bulge. This practice is common among trans-men and individuals who cross-dress as male. In slang, the term ‘packing’ means having a man-bulge.
